Update on life

Well it is May 6 2010, I haven't wrote anything it like a year. I have been really busy. I have changed jobs I now work for Valley Foods. I kinda miss working at Millsaps and all my friends. You really find out who your friends are when you leave a job to go somewhere else. I have lost all, but two of my friends from Millsaps its pretty sad if you ask me. I had a BFF or at least I thought so. She hasn't talked to me since I left. She was really upset that I was leaving, but like I told her it was a better job and we could still hang out, do things together or at least I thought we could. I have text this person a couple of times in the last three or four months, but got no response. Its a crying shame. Life must go on...

I have lost a baby and almost a wife in this short time since I last wrote. My baby died August 31st. He died before birth. It was a sad thing we had to lay him in a casket and then in the ground. He was the most beautifulest thing I had ever seen. I really miss him. He looked like my mother-in-law in the face it was so funny. When she sleeps sitting straight up in the back seat of the van she kinda reminds me of him and I start to tear up. Three or four weeks after we lay ed him in the ground Mandy was coming home from the D.G. and hit several trees. It scared the hell out of me when she called to tell us she had wrecked. You know when you come up on a accident it always looks worse than it really is. She stepped away with just some really bad bruises. The Monday before Christmas she was on her way to work and hit a some ice and then hit the bridge and rolled my jeep five or six times. A lady had stopped to help her and called us to let us know she had been in a wreck. It made my heart stop to hear that again. We jumped in the car and rushed to the wreck, but on the way we meet the ambulance so we turned around and headed to the hospital. She had some cuts, bruises, a broke ankle and road rash it didn't even look like her. I remember thinking when we walked in the emergency room where is my wife the person laying on the bed did not look like Mandy. She was OK or if that's what you want to call it. It has been five months and Mandy still can't walk that good.

We found out we were expecting again and are really excited. I just hope this one makes it. I don't think my wife can handle another death. Its another boy I am really excited about that we have came up with a name William Camden.

I really need to get some sleep maybe I won't wait so long to get back on here.

Summer

Today is May 2, 2009, All the students are leaving and going home and I'm stuck at work cleaning, but I get to be off as of tomorrow for 3 months. I think this is so cool. Ms. D's said we could keep writing on our blogs if we wanted too. I have it all planned out the whole summer. First we are going to Destin,Fla for about a week at the end of May. We have to buy baby clothes and what better place to shop that Destin. I just can't see my wife being pregnant all summer that's going to be bad on me and her. She is already moody can you imagine when she gets out in the sun all summer its going to be bad. Well I hope not Maybe she will be less moody when she gets up and moving around some this summer. Back to what I have planed Mandy, Katie, and me are going Florida. When we get back Mandy will have to go back to work, but me and Katie are just going to lay around the pool and soak up the sun. Well that's all I have so far. I will be getting back to you soon.

Art

This art work is in the museum of modern art in New York city by Ralph Borland. He thinks that all you have to be is creative that a picture is just as good as a painting. I thinks he crazy. I mean just look at the picture. It has know meaning. I guess that everything is creative in someones elses eyes.

Earth

Why are we here on earth? What are we meant to do here on earth? Here lately I have wonder this. I have not come up with the answer yet. I have asked a lot of doctors this answer and they couldn't even give me the answer. I have heard that god put us here for a purpose, but what was the purpose. There are some many things that we are doing to earth that some people say are wrong, but are they. I mean we learn something new about earth everyday, but still the questions are not answered. Are we really meant to be born here live our lives and then die. Its like thier's somebody watching us through an hour glass like we are a small planet inside a hour glass where scientist study us above. We could be like mice. We study mice all the time. Maybe there is a lot of somethings studying us to see how we live and react.

Dreams

Why do we dream? Do we dream just to give us something to do while we sleep. Maybe dreams are suppose to make us smarter or dumper. I have heard that most people never hit the rim stage in there sleep because they are dreaming. I have also heard that you dream after you hit the rim stage in your sleep, but for me its none of these. I always dream of people chasing me its like I'm always getting into trouble in my dreams. I had this dream one time that I was in court accused of killing someone. I dream of always being on the run from everything including life. I always wake up frightened and worried that this really happened. I wondered sometimes that if I handcuff myself to the bed would it keep me from worry about it the next day. You know just to show myself that I never left the bed. I wouldn't hurt a fly. I don't even like to hunt. I prefer to go hunting and just sit there and take pictures of nature. I just wish that I could have those dreams where you wake up happy, aroused, or just excited about living to the next day.

"Creativity": To Be or Not To Be

I have a rapid cycling manic disorder. I have read in my Get Creative class that doctors and scientists from the past believe that people with this disorder are creative. I don't believe I'm creative sometimes I do creative things, but as far as drawing, painting or writing I'm not creative. I might be creative in other ways, but I haven't discovered it yet. I'm just slow at doing task, I never get anything done on time, I forget about what I'm suppose to do half the time. I can't remember anything, If you were to ask me what I was wearing yesterday I couldn't tell you. I have a hard time with day to day life. I have even went out the door and forgot to put on shoes or got to the store and realize I had no wallet. So maybe all of this is a type of creativity that scientists haven't really discovered yet.

Jackson Pollock

I think Jackson Pollock is one of the most creative painters of all time. Some people may refer to his work as childish finger paintings, and to each his own. To me, it is not what he paints, but how he paints. His personal style of expression is quite fascinating. Instead of attaching a canvas to an easel and having a vision, Pollock lives the vision, He takes his canvas, and spreads it out onto the floor leaving space to move freely around it. He likes to see the painting as it develops from all angles, and laying it out on the floor is the only way he feels he can ‘see’ the art. This would make more sense of his work to those people referring to it as childish crap. He’s a unique person that produces unique art.